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On my way to attend the national SIDS/Stillbirth
conference in September 2005, it dawned on me, this would be my first trip to
Washington DC since “that” time. My husband and I fled our home in July 2000 to
“vacation” in DC during the time Solomon was due. Born still March 8 of that
year, we had endured a myriad of obstacles to even approach our path of
healing. The thought of being in my “normal” routine on July 28th
was too much to bear.
I think of this now as my Amtrak train approaches Union Station. On the morning of July 28, 2000, I fantasized about a mystery knocker at our hotel room door, delivering a baby as if we had ordered one from room service. I recall the guttural sobs emerging from my body, the shaking and the tears, Eric’s strong arms and body around me, keeping me from self-combusting. And even now, 5+ years later, I was engaged in that same fantasy thinking; hoping somehow that Solomon would be delivered to me in DC.